Armed with a fresh MBA post graduate degree in Marketing & HR, the year 2004 felt like it was going to be MY year. While many of my friends had barely managed to secure a job during the campus placements, I was one of the three management trainees recruited by a major retail giant, from a group of 100 candidates. The retail industry was booming and it felt like destiny herself was carving out my success story. I felt prouder of the fact that I had said no to joining my father’s business because I wanted to know what the real corporate world felt like. I didn’t realize then that I wasn’t mentally or emotionally ready for the roller-coaster ride that was waiting. I always had the option to pack and leave, but today I’m so glad I stayed—and fought back to prove myself.

Although the organization had an impressive training program for management trainees on paper, nothing translated into reality. For 4 months, all I remember was being pushed around from one city to another. It was almost as if the managers themselves did not know what to do with me. I was unable to learn anything at all because wherever I was posted, it was clear that I wasn’t really wanted. After all, it’s a bigger headache to train a fresher!

Already faced with the prospect of surviving in a city where I didn’t know the language and being completely on my own, I began to wonder if signing up for this had been a mistake. Soon, I received a letter saying that I would now be posted at the Head Office in a much more cosmopolitan city. I secretly thanked my lucky stars, blissfully unaware that the real unhappy days were still ahead. Since there was a shortage of people in HR, I was considered a good fit because of my HR specialization. I was to report to Krispin, a senior manager who had immense retail experience.

At the beginning, I reassured myself that I was in good hands. I thought that finally, I would learn something of value. How good it would be to tell that to my parents too, who were still wondering why I was wasting my time working for someone else.

I was given a chance to be part of walk-in interviews. I was asked to look into a few formalities with regard to the next batch of management trainees who were due to arrive the following month. Soon, my juniors joined me and we were given a whole room with computers to ourselves. A few of them were involved in the recruitment of future employees whereas the others were asked to arrange the personal dossiers of existing employees. When I would approach Krispin to ask him how I could help, he would pretend to be busy. He would tell me to talk to other HR personnel about a new employee fund that the organization had started. But when I would do just that, he would yell at me for doing so. These episodes of being yelled at for doing anything I was told only became more frequent. Soon I was getting a dressing down in front of the juniors too. I had never felt so humiliated and I can still remember the shocked silence in the room after one such episode. My juniors were quick to console me, but it only made me feel worse. Until today, I don’t know why my manager singled me out and wrote me off as a failure. One day, out of the blue, I was told that I would no longer be reporting at the Head Office and that I would be assigned to one of the retail outlets. By now, I had become sick of being pushed all over the place. I argued that it was precisely because I was not in one department for long that my learning was still zero. I realised that he wasn’t sending me to the outlet because I was needed there; it was his first attempt to make me so frustrated that I would leave on my own.

All the management trainees who were recruited were put on a probation period for 6 months, after which they had a review and were only then confirmed as employees. It came as a shock when I received an official letter saying that my probation period had been extended for another 3 months. The letter explained that my performance wasn’t good enough. ‘How can they evaluate my performance when I was never given a chance to perform at all?’ I asked the outlet manager as tears rolled down my cheeks. ‘You have the option to leave, or to stay and fight,’ said the outlet manager. Going back to my parents with a certificate stating I had failed hurt my pride and I said I would fight. I couldn’t stop thinking about my other batch mates who had all been confirmed without any problems. ‘You should know one more thing,’ said my HR senior with whom I was training. ‘Krispin did not want to pay you your salary either. He said that it would be a reason enough for you to leave. He really hates you.’ I just didn’t know what to say.

I worked hard over the next 3 months to learn all I could so that I would become a confirmed employee. Thankfully, I no longer had to report to Krispin and my new boss handed me my confirmation letter after a short review. I was then assigned to a separate retail outlet where I was in charge of all the HR activities. When it was time for my yearly appraisal, I learnt the hard way that I would not be promoted on par with my batch mates because my confirmation had happened much later. It meant that I was now at the same level as my juniors and had to face another humiliation of watching my batch mates climb the corporate ladder faster and receive better perks. It took all my willpower and plenty of encouragement from friends to wipe away my tears and to stay focused on the job at hand. My efforts paid off. Within another year, I was in charge of 3 stores and was even mentoring a few new trainees. My new boss was an angel who supported and guided me and who always made me feel like I was giving something back. I now had the confidence to take on bigger responsibilities like setting up new retail outlets, training the staff, recruiting and doing their yearly appraisals. When Krispin dropped by for an HR meeting one day, he happened to sarcastically comment that he was surprised to see me actually doing some work—to which my new boss replied that I wasn’t just doing work, but that I would be given more outlets to handle. The surprised look on Krispin’s face gave me such a kick.

By early 2007, I decided that I was ready to move up in my personal life too, which meant that I had to quit my job. The biggest compliment I received on my last day at work was when an outlet manager called me ‘An A- grade HR executive’ and my immediate senior told me that I could be relied on because my work was always professional and well done. I remember smiling with such happy tears, because this was the feedback I had slogged so hard for. Through all the nasty times, I had managed to fight back. And I won!